Where's Your Man?

Ok...

We've all seen it before...

There's a beautiful, talented, educated woman sitting alone...maybe in a Starbucks...maybe at your favorite bar...maybe even at your job.

She seems perfectly sane. Pretty normal. Has a pleasant attitude. She's cool to kick it with...

And she's single...

Then there's the girl who's penis I.Q. is higher than her credit score...

She's as sexually liberated as they come and makes no bones about it...

She's not concerned with a ring, she's not concerned with a relationship most of the time...she's only concerned with fulfilling her own needs.

What's wrong with this picture?

Well, to me...nothing.

Why?

I'll tell you...

Right after the break...












Lemme ask you a question though....is ya happy?

Ok...

So, you want to know why the "Dime on Paper" isn't being swooned over and picked up, while the "Heifer of Ill Repute" always has a man?

I'll tell you...but you may not like the answer...

More often than not, the "Heifer of Ill Repute" has been around enough men to know exactly how to charm a man into fulfilling her every desire. Be it physical, sexual, mental, emotional, or financial.

She is the woman he likes the most because she is honest with him and herself about the nature of their relationship. More often than not, the "Dime on Paper" goes into date #1 with these high minded expectations and she unknowingly paints a picture of a man that either a) doesn't exist or b) scares the hell out of the guy sitting across the table from her.

More than likely at this phase in her life she's become slightly consumed with the concept of marriage, future, kids, or a minivan.

Now don't get me wrong, I don't think it's wrong to desire a good man. I don't think its wrong to have high standards. I don't think its wrong to want a marriage, a few kids, and a Toyota Sienna with one of those soccer ball magnets with "Makenzye" on the back. (Yeah...I want one of those....not the van...the soccer ball...stop laughing...)

The problem therein lies when your initial interactions with men come off more like an interview than hanging out with somebody and having surf n' turf.

You wanna know why the man YOU like seems to enjoy the company of the "Heifer of Ill Repute?"

I'll tell you...after the break...













Ok...lemme give ya'll a little glimpse into the male mind for a second...

The "Heifer of Ill Repute" has mastered the art of being the friend and the "love interest" at the same time.

A dude knows he doesn't have to impress her, because they're cool. He accepts her, she accepts him. They are friends at the base level. She doesn't get mad when he wants to play XBox and he doesn't get mad when she wants to go out with her girls. They have a comfort level with one another.

When it comes to their relationship behind closed doors, there's no pressure...at least not after the first time. That's a whole 'nother blog post.

She may bring him something to eat on the strength of their friendship...he may buy her a drink or 3 in the club for the same reason.

Why aren't they together in a relationship then? Well, he knows how she is...

Most men are too insecure to be in a relationship with a woman who's liberal about her sexuality. They always second guess her. They are always concerned about what some other man is thinking or doing with their lady...

I'm a wee bit different...

So, what's the moral of the story...

The moral is, if you're pretty, intelligent, goal oriented, and have a lot to offer...relax...there are good men out there...and they're looking for you. More than likely they want to build a foundation of friendship though before they go out and buy you a blue box...

Oh ya'll thought I didn't know bout the blue box?

*Jeezy voice* Sidney Poitier what dey do?!?!?!

Ok...that was random...

Back to the moral of the story...

Take a lesson from the "Heifer of Ill Repute" and learn to just be cool...sit back...Prince Charming already likes you otherwise he wouldn't be hanging with you...just don't scare him the hell off...

Ya'll take it easy...

--Bleek G.